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May 19

NAKED ADVICE: Real-life bachelor must choose between two women he loves

 Dear Harlan:

I’m a 24-year-old male who broke up with a longtime girlfriend about a year and a half ago. Since then, I’ve been dating around. In particular, I’ve dated two women, both for about 10 to 12 months. (Both women know about each other.)

I was thoroughly enjoying it all during my “I want to stay single and meet lots of women” stage. But now I’m in the “I need some kind of commitment” stage. Things are getting (or have been) intense with both women. I like them both, and at times I wonder if I’m actually in love. I have no idea what to do. I have such strong feelings for both women, but I need to make a difficult decision. Do you think it’s possible to be in love with multiple women at the same time? Any help is appreciated.

–Another Bachelor

Dear Bachelor:

Yes, I think you can be in love with multiple women at the same time. It just gets tricky when entering the “which girlfriend gets to sit in the front seat while driving to visit both their families over the holidays” stage. 

This whole thing is bad. It’s bad for you, and it’s bad for them. The fact that they both let things get so intense while knowing that there was someone else says it all. How healthy can these women be if they let things go this long?

As for my advice, think about taking a break from them both. Clear your head. Start the New Year single. If you find yourself having to choose later, pick the one who gives you space during your break. This should be the one who loves you more than she needs you. But the way it sounds, they both might need you more than they love you.

- Need Naked Advice? Click here to write Harlan

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