Dear Harlan:

You’re the worst. You are a complete kiss-up to women and an embarrassment to the male sex!

–Incensed Reader

Dear Incensed Reader:

Thanks for your happy thoughts. Glad to help you let it out.

So, I agree, I might appear to kiss up to women. But, I think you’re confusing kissing up to women with respecting women. I’ve learned that encouraging women to demand respect isn’t always a popular position (sadly). I think the problem is that a man who dates women who demands respect is a man who has to work harder -- meaning more listening, more compromising and doing more. But in all fairness, I do encourage men to demand respect too. It’s just the majority of letters I answer are from women dealing with difficult relationships, oftentimes with men. Whether it’s a man or woman, when a partner is silenced, ignored, abused or alienated, that reader gets my support. You can call it what you want, but call it both ways if you want to call me out.

- Need Naked Advice? Click here to write Harlan